He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
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