I'm pants shitting drunk right now
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
