If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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