i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
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