I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
cat food counts as protein by the way
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
