You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
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