ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
