do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
there is glitter all over my balls
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
