its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
