Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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