There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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