found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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