I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
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