Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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