i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
