Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
