I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I have fence marks all over my body
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
