I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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