i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
