I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize