I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
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