I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
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