Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
