Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
