dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
