The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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