this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
So vagazzling was a success
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
