i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
