I can't watch pbs sober anymore
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
