how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize