Dual....:-)
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
