You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
