in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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