Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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