I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
