When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
