Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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