it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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