i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize