that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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