I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
