im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
