You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
