Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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