I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
