i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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