My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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