he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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