Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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