Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
